Sunday, November 19, 2017

Untethered

I have had some huge milestones as of late!

I took my last immuno-suppresant medication last Monday. On the
same day, I also had my very last session with Ivy. Not only was it
the last infusion, the actual IV pole is now out of the house. They
picked it up and it's gone.

This makes me very happy. But it is also terribly frightening. It's another
step in feeling "normal" and being independent. However, I have been
closely watched and monitored and poked and prodded since January.
Now, I get fewer blood tests. There is talk, albeit brief, of removing the
PICC line. I get my first vaccines on Monday.

The docs and nurses are getting me ready to be on my own. Well, as much
on my own as my situation allows. And I'm in a panic. Untethered from my
IV, free floating in the world where germs exist, and unknowns exist. But
life is out here too.

I'm flapping about trying to get my bearings. But I think there is a safe place
when I land. I am hoping so.
Like a bird learning how to fly, I am being pushed from my nest. I will learn
to use my wings. I will learn how to trust living.